growing up, growing larger, growing old...

i had a wonderful week at the beach with my parents. we laughed and talked about all sorts of things. i've always thought that my daddy was funny, the life of the party! but i realized this week that my sharp, intelligent wit comes directly from my mother.

with the pattern of the tide we drug our chairs in and out each day in order to stay at the "edge of the water." in between these relocations she had quite the witty knowledge to impart... about growing up, growing larger, and growing old.

here are my top 5 of her words of wisdom:

1. it is evident that some people are just seeing themselves for the first time down here. why do they feel the need to BEGIN an exercise regimen at the beach??

2. if your belly ring disappers when you sit down, you probably don't need one. (if you have a belly, nor should you wear a belly "shirt").

3. check out that skinny bird. she looks about my age and she doesn't really look better than a bigger one. after 50 it all REALLY falls down. it doesn't matter much if you're thick or stick--old is old.

4. tattoos, tattoos everywhere.
    the old tattoos give us a scare.
    so young girls, i give this advice.
    before you tattoo, think it twice:
    how will this tattoo appear
    as age wears on, year after year?
    that thing will stretch and fade and fall.
    and won't look today's--at all.

5. between the internet and high school reunions, i have decided that i do not want to look like a duckbilled platypus or the joker. i'll stay away from those injections and out from under the knife. it will be enough for me and your daddy to grow old gracefully as the good Lord intended.

for more of gail's insight, stay tuned.